It was pretty rough in my family when I was a kid. My brother and I didn’t have friends over much because of my dad. We kept to ourselves, and only socialised with cousins and stuff.

Dad drank a lot and he used to swear his head off, and smash things. When he came home from the pub we’d all panic if we heard the tyres screech in the driveway, because we knew that would mean he would be in a massive rage. We’d hide in our room, and listen to Mum and Dad screaming abuse at each other.

By this time, my mum was drinking, too. I remember feeling terrified, but because both of my parents were going ape shit, I felt like I had to hold it together and look after my little brother.

Dad only hit me a few times (he hit my mum a lot more), but the constant verbal abuse was far worse. He’d say things like: ‘You are a fucking waste of space’ or ‘You’ll never amount to anything’. He would always apologise when he sobered up, and he seemed really sorry, but he would just do it all again a week later.

When I was sixteen, my mum joined Alcoholics Anonymous and finally kicked Dad out of the house. It was a horrible time. Even though it was kind of a relief, you can’t stop loving your father even if he is violent and cruel half the time.

I started overeating, and had trouble sleeping. Everything seemed too hard and I felt irritable and angry. I was convinced that everyone hated me, so I had a pretty awful time socially. Whenever I went out, I’d be thinking that everyone was watching me and thinking I was an idiot or a dick head. I could never stand up for myself, and in fact, I would attack myself before anyone else could.

In Year 11, I saw the school counsellor, and she told me that I probably had depression. Mum took me to her GP, who referred me to a psychologist. She helped me understand how my negative thinking affected my feelings, and gave me all these exercises to do. I needed medication for a few months, too.

It took about a year, but slowly the black veil started to lift and I began to feel much happier about myself and my life.

I’m a teacher now (it’s my second year out), and I definitely don’t think I’m a waste  of space any more.